You can’t take it with you…

by hedy on October 8, 2009

So, I’ve been stewing on a post on this concept for several months.  Sometimes it’s silly little things-on my graduation present trip to Disney World in 2002, my dad and I had been joking for months about getting our photo from the Tower of Terror.  We rode, we saw the photo, my dad decide it was too expensive.  Three years later, on my mom’s and my trip to Disneyland, I turned to my mother and said “I wish Dad had gotten the darn picture.”  Less than four months before he died, my parents went on a long-awaited silver anniversary trip to Paris.  When we were visiting with a family friend after the mass, she kept on perseverating on the fact “[my parents] were so smart to just go to Paris, as you never know.”  My mother tried to point out that while she was glad they went, they had their ducks in  row, so the cost wasn’t an issue.

Fast forward to 2008.  Said family friend’s husband goes through multiple cancer treatments (frankly, at the risk of sounding morbid, I was checking emergency flight fares to go to his funeral about weekly at that point) and comes out clean.  Then, his beloved Nittany Lions made it to the Rose Bowl.  They debated going with his fraternity, but decided the cost was too high.  In my opinion, they could have afforded it if the cut out some extras.  He died in May.

Now, I’m seeing it play out for a friend of mine. Her father died suddenly, and, in addition to all the other issues that came with death, she was worried about having to shoulder the burden of his debts.  Although it’s turned out that she doesn’t, she’s still left shouldering the physical manifestation of his fiscal irresponsibility.

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her every cent counts October 9, 2009 at 12:41 am

Very interesting post, and relevant to me. My father is dying of cancer. He has, maybe, 2 years left to live. I am not sure. He is on radiation treatments now, and probably not healthy enough to travel, though he is more able to travel now then he will be in a year. But he is waiting for his 401k to come due. Now he has to cut back and not travel even though he has $1M in savings for retirement for both him and my mother. I almost want to buy him and my mom a trip to Italy because he always says he wants to travel and go to Europe, but he never has outside of London. But then I also know it may already be too late for him to go, I don’t know if it would be a good idea for him to travel so far from the U.S. now. Even though you should never spend more than you have and go into debt for it, you have to spend sometimes and live for now instead of tomorrow.

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